Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Revenge of the MILFs

Once again women of America are about to be subjected to an onslaught of 'what men think you should be'. This time, in a new Unreality TV show, called Hottest Mom in America, contestants are lining up, babies cradled in their arms, to be judged as worthy of appearing on TV based on looks, and, no doubt, social incompatability with other contestants.

Now I like looking at women just as much as the next guy. Heck, maybe even more than the next guy, but this seems like such an arbitrary competition. I mean, let's face it. You don't need a reality show to pick who you think is the most attractive woman out of a crowd and say "YOU! YOU ARE THE HOTTEST MOM IN AMERICA!" but apparently the producers of this show seem to think that WE THE PEOPLE should choose over a long period of time, who is hotter this week than they were last week. Then, of course, if the show's a success, there'll be another series, debunking the theory that the woman who wins this contest is actually the Hottest Mom in America by picking someone totally different. Much like the Greatest Rock Songs in the World... Ever CD was followed by the Greatest Rock Songs in the World... Ever 2, which, if my song was on the second disc, would piss me off. I mean, how come I never made it onto the first disc? Not great enough for you, you pathetic wankers!

But I digress. Mothers across America are lining up for this competition in order to appear on TV, and win a prize, but they're being duped. Essentially, this whole thing is a ruse to find the "Face of Restylane", a new Botox-like "Dermal Filler" which is injected into the face. All entrants must agree to participate not just in the TV competition, but also in the Face of Restylane competition. The winner of the TV competition gets $25,000 college scholarship for one child, $25,000 in cold hard cash AND one year's free treatment of Restylane.

In other words, even America's Hottest Mom is not hot enough for America. She must inject her face with hyaluronic acid in order to feel good about herself. Now, if the woman vote the hottest mom in America needs to be injected with 'dermal fillers' after she wins the competition, what does that say to all the women at home watching the show?

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